History: The past events of a period in time, or in the life or development of a people, an institution, or a place

Whatever age you are at present, you have a history, a string of events. You have stories to tell about your walk thus far and will have more to share as you carry on living. Each little experience whether good or bad in your perception has bearing to what you are today.

“What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment.  And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new.  Right now.” Author Unknown

I cannot say for certain that the events that have happened in my own life are what I would have chosen for myself had I been afforded the opportunity to lay out my life plan at the moment of birth and I expect that this is true for everyone. As we take new steps into life, albeit wobbly at first, we slowly learn to master what works for us and what does not. Through this process we find that what we initially thought we wanted may not ring true anymore and we have the wonderful ability to change our minds and hearts to accommodate new ideas, new goals, new vision and direction.

What I would like you to ponder over this weekend is the following: Is your past a heavy burden that you carry on your back like a pack horse under pressure? Do you pick out moments of negativity to reinforce a bad self-image? Can you go back and revise decisions taken to avoid what turned out to what you now think was an error or mistake? Are there regrets that you mull over? Do you remind yourself of the lessons that have been learned or growth that has happened since then? What are the reasons you delve into that Pandora’s Box?

Do you recall happy times and repeatedly replay them wishing you could go back to that time? Do you desire or hope to recapture the feelings of elation or acceptance you felt then? If so, what is lacking in your life right now that is not fulfilling you? What do you gain from recollections that are favourable? Do you use these memories to remind yourself of what you are capable of or how blessed you have been?  What are the reasons you continue to float on that Cloud 9?

Because there is no retracing of steps, no going back over a path or route again there is only one thing left to do - undergo an attitude readjustment! If you can look back occasionally with an open heart and clear mind you might realise that, in spite of all the ebbs and flows, you have the choice to do it with a new attitude and new mind-set. Notice that I deliberately used the word ‘occasionally’, which means from time to time, it doesn’t mean constantly! Take a look at your history and give yourself a proverbial pat on the back for doing so well and coming so far. The summation of every event has led you to where you are now. Wiser and stronger, more self-assured, more analytical and curious! You now have all the tools necessary to make new decisions, to venture into un-chartered territory with confidence. 

The past is a work of art, free of irrelevancies and loose ends. Max Beerbohm

 


Comments

Melanie Cowan
10/08/2013 05:27

I happened on your website through the All for Women sire here in South Africa. Your talk about leaving things in the past caught my eye, as I have been going through a 'thing' over the past 2 years. I was unfairly dismissed after being sexually harassed at a company I had worked at for 11 years, without pay. As a single mother, I was devastated emotionally and financially. I am still in the middle of the court case, which I will win, its just a matter of time, but I often lament over my old home, and my old life, instead of thinking about the job I have now. Less pay, but no harassment, I work with wonderful people, I actually look forward to coming in to work every day! So thank-you, it was just what I needed today!

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02/04/2014 09:01

A few years after my divorce, i met a loving a caring man. We were both divorced and thought nothing wrong in pursuing a relationship. He was so happy with me, and disaster struck when his ex-wife found out about our relationship. He should used to call me and harrass me everyday, demanding that i leave him. She could not deal with their divorce and was still chasing after him. It was a nightmare. We were now in a 7 year relationship, which was perfect except for the ex-wife . I tolerated everything , and continued to build what we had. Then , one day i found out he re-married his exwife, after a year. He still continued with our realtionship, and tried to keep that a secret. I ws so devastated and an emotional wreck.. Thank you for your words, on your website. they eased the pain and allowed me to slowly regain control of my life again.

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